Why is so Damn’ Hard to Be Different

Masks

We all wear different masks in today’s society. The mask of a father or mother, the mask of a friend, the mask of a son or daughter, the mask of an employee or boss…

A different mask for different people. We think we need them to be the best versions of ourselves towards others. But do we?

Isn’t being 100% honest with everyone a better idea? If someone doesn’t like who we are, they don’t need to spend time with us. It’s better to part ways than spend time with the wrong crowd.

I’d rather choose that someone is direct with me than tell me what I want to hear. It’s easy to be a friend to someone when you hear only things you want to hear. That’s why we choose our friends based on our shared interests. But this won’t ever inspire a change in us. If we think we are perfect, why would we want to change?

Being Different

When someone is different, he poses a threat to an entire society. Being different is hard. Being different is being unique. You need to know that being different is not a bad thing. Not bad at all. Actually, it’s desirable. Especially in today’s world, where everyone is trying to copy others.

Being different drives change. And change is always good. Even if it’s bad, you can find something beautiful in it. People grow the most when they are outside their comfort zone. When everything is like we want, and everything goes according to our will, we like it. We like it because it’s easy. Our mind likes it because it doesn’t need to work so hard to solve new challenges. But we don’t grow when everything is easy. We grow when life gets hard. When our precious little machine needs to work overtime just to keep up with the change. How to solve this, how to solve that? When life imposes hardships on us. That is when we grow. And usually, that’s when the change happens.

If You’re Not Growing, You’re Dying

Someone once said a great analogy that has stuck in my mind ever since. Imagine an apple on a tree. A beautiful red apple. That apple is growing. Full of life.

Now, imagine that apple is picked by someone, or it falls on the ground on its own. The moment it’s separated from the tree, the apple starts its journey toward a slow death. Apple never stays in the status quo. It slowly spoils. Dying inside. Even when you see that red, beautiful looking apple from outside, a change is happening on the inside. A change not visible to the eye. A change that will be apparent only after a few days.

It’s the same with all of us. Joshua Fields Millburn of The Minimalists said it best:

If you're not growing, you're dying; and if you're dying, then, by definition, you're not living a meaningful life.

And this is the simplest truth there is. There is no status quo in our lives. Even if we like to think there is. But that’s a lie. A lie world and society want to sell us.

Be Different

Be different. Defy social norms. There is another way. A better way. Way of freedom and opportunities. Only when we leave our comfort zone, we can experience the world in full.

Live life on your own terms. If you’re not happy working for someone 40-50-60 hours a week – don’t. Make a plan to leave and then execute it. A billion other opportunities await you. If you want to start a business, start it. Don’t try to learn and know everything before you do. All the gatekeepers of society will try to stop you with many rules that you have to follow. But start no matter what and then learn as you move. Don’t wait for the perfect moment to start living your life. You will surely regret it. If not before, then on your deathbed.

I always wanted to write, but I was afraid to start. Afraid because my English is not good enough. I’m self-taught, so I don’t know all the rules of grammar and spelling. I don’t have enough time. I just need more time to get better and then I’ll start. Millions of reasons why I am not good enough. But look at me, here I am writing this post to you. To try to inspire change in you. To tell you that you don’t need to be afraid if you’re different or scared of failure. You need to be afraid of not starting. So, leave all the masks you are wearing behind and be true you.

Even if you fail, you will fail beautifully. And maybe you will inspire someone else to try.

If you ever find yourself in the wrong story, leave.

Mo Willems

 

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